Question
Hello,
I have a question regarding the meditation method where you are told to "watch your thoughts, to be aware of your thoughts and let them flow by". I have visited alot of websites to find out more about this method but I still can't find the answer im looking for, which is, How.
I understand what you need to do, but not how I should do it.
I mean, how do I become aware of my thoughts, and how do I know that I am aware of them? I am very frustrated, and simply cannot figure out how I should do it. I can very easily take my awareness to my left foot for example because I know where it is located, but with my thoughts, I don't know where they are or where to look for them. So how can I then become aware of them?
So basically my Question is, HOW can I be aware of my thoughts (where to look for them, and how to be aware of them), and HOW do I know that I am aware of them?
I really want to understand this meditation technique but simply don't understand how to be aware of my thoughts when I don't know what/ where they are.
I've asked this before to another experts, but I want to see your answer to this aswell. Thanks in advance.
Answer
Hi, John.
My first question is what is your motivation for wanting to follow some "experts" and doing some technique that somebody suggests? I think it's very helpful to look at your motivation. Many people consider meditation to be a technique for gaining some mental skills or for training oneself to have certain states of mind.
To me, meditative time is much simpler. It is setting aside - for a period of time - the usual kinds of goal oriented activity. If I set aside that kind of activity, I will sit still. Then the only purpose is to be in touch with what is actually going on inside and outside. There is no "purpose" behind this. It is just the simplest way of being. However, in doing this I think a person will naturally discover that certain things sort themselves out or become obvious that couldn't do that when I was moving around with the mind focused on a goal.
So sitting still and not interfering with what is going on inside and outside and yet allowing there to be awareness of it all is a very simple way of being but we aren't used to it. For that reason it takes a little rearranging of our habits to include this simple sitting time.
I don't personally see any need to focus on being aware of thoughts. Many people want something to focus on when they sit quietly because, perhaps, we are used to focusing on something all day long. We don't know what to do if we don't focus and this is uncomfortable. It strikes me just now that focusing, for me, also means that I have a goal. I focus for a reason - to get more business or more money or more friends or to solve a problem or fix something.
You didn't actually ask about focusing on thoughts but rather on watching and being aware of thoughts. I'm not sure if "focusing" is an issue for you but that's what came up for me. As for watching or being aware, why limit it to thoughts? Is it possible just to be simply present - awake, not lost in daydreaming - so that whatever is noticeable can be noticed - the sound of the fan, the feel of the warm air, the heaviness of the body, the tired state of mind? If a bird sings outside the window, you don't have to do something to hear it. You don't have to work to "watch" or "be aware of it". If a thought goes through the mind, you may notice it or it may go to fast to be noticed. Does it matter? Is a thought more important than the hum of the fan or sound of the bird or feeling in the foot?
If there is not so much focusing, all of this may be perceived not as one thing, then another thing, then another thing but as all happening in one open space of awareness.
If the thoughts quiet down and seem to disappear, much more can be heard, so no need to drum up more thoughts to watch. It's a wonderful thing to notice that there is much happening right here and now that has nothing to do with thoughts, especially concerns about my life, what I need to do, what has happened in the past, what skills I need to learn to protect myself for the future. These thoughts have such a sense of reality and of importance, but in the moment that these thoughts come up, they are just mental static compared to the the simplicity and reality of what is actually here.
If you do have concerns about your life, a good way to get fresh insight is to experiment for a short time with forgetting about your problems completely and observing life and yourself instead. Then when your concerns come back up, you will be more intimately familiar with the context of the concerns. By that I mean you will be more directly, intimately familiar with life as it is and with yourself as you really are.
I don't know if this addresses your question or not. Feel free to write back and ask me clarify something or to ask another question.
Best wishes,
Jay
